The outsiders

The outsidersIt’s funny that I grew up in a very conservative home, but when I look back, I watched some pretty rough movies, at least based on the measures I use for my boys now.

I was reminded of one of those movies this weekend called The Outsiders.  It’s about the rivalry between two gangs, the poor Greasers and the rich Socs (socials), and the intensity between them when one gang member kills a member of the other.  But there are more recent films that portray the damaging effects of the divisions we create based on social cliques.  More recently there’s even the female-adapted theme in the Mean Girls series.

We watch these films for their entertainment value, but they really are an amplified portrayal of our lives on some level.

We live with imaginary circles drawn all around us.  Quite possibly unintentionally, we go through life knowing who is in and who’s out.   Whether we divide ourselves by geography, social economic status, race, or the unwritten adult popularity contests that play themselves out on Facebook, in our kids schools, and our places of work, there are most definitely, insiders and outsiders.

I wonder what would happen if those of us who’ve ever felt like an outsider (which is all of us) started ignoring those walls.

What would happen if we included everyone, not just the cool kids?  What if we cared for people who don’t fit in the insider’s circle?  What if we intentionally spent time with them and included them?

It would change us.  

All of us.

We can pretend that we are shiny happy people holding hands, but until we’re really loving and caring for each other, like we belong to each other, it’s all just a mirage.  We’re no better than the Greasers and the Socs, even inside our own social circles.

Wherever your life takes you today, think about that.  Think about who is included and who’s on the outside.  Open up the circle.  For heaven’s sake, break down the dang door.  These are the games we play to feel safe.  You don’t have to play by those rules.

You are wiser.  You are stronger.  You are more loving.

You can change things.

to more love,



  1. “Break down the dang door!” This line is awesome!!!
    Love you!

    1. Ha! Thanks Toni! That’s apparently what I say when I’m writing and I’m fired up!! Love you too.

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