What makes a good mother?
If you would’ve asked me this question before I gave birth, I would’ve said, “Someone who cares for her kids and their needs; someone who protects her children from pain. A good mother is always there. She’s your best friend, making things easier, better.”
Basically Mary Poppins, not a parent.
A few years into this mothering gig my idea of ‘good’ has shifted. I no longer think a good mother is a pain protector, but someone who prepares her children for the inevitable. She’s not always there, because she’s modeling what a full and complete life looks like for a woman.
A good mother makes mistakes in front of her child’s face and then apologizes in plain sight.
A good mother is honest. She doesn’t lie to her kids or let them win at games. There are lessons to be found in difficulty and defeat.
A good mother doesn’t sugarcoat the fact that life is hard. She just equips her people to fight the battle better and together.
A good mother asks for help and then accepts it.
A good mother carves out time for herself—because no one benefits from a depleted woman.
A good mother sees her child for exactly who they are—not the vision she had in her head.
I could list about a hundred more things, but the bottom line is this:
Good mothers aren’t the ones with the prettiest photos or prettiest lives, they are real women who live right inside the mess of motherhood and are honest about it.
Good mothers give their children permission to be filled with imperfections by showing them they’re full of the same.
To more love,
Stephanie
1 Comments
Shelley
Awwww children need to win at games 🙂 It makes them happy and models success in life- they just have to know to play fair. They need to experience lots of joy & happiness in childhood, so they’ll know to seek it in adulthood, and not succumb to misery when life gets challenging. And of course to know they can pray to God and Jesus Christ when they need help, and of course this goes for parents, too, if you’re feeling discouraged. Take your kids to the pool, amusement parks, let them ride their bikes around, and support their happiness and good cheer 🙂 And don’t teach them that life is hard, because that is traumatizing.