Today, I found this note in my car.
It’s really easy for some people to have good days. My husband is one of those people. Dark clouds just don’t exist for him.
Nor does depression.
But that’s me. Someone who has to fight a little harder for her light.
I used to think it must be so hard to live with someone with depression. Someone who’s moody and intolerant and constantly assessing her own feelings. Mental health management often means you have to have a keen sense of yourself. It means you are constantly taking your own temperature, sometimes leaving little space to tend to the needs of others. This isn’t a selfish quality, more so a necessary one. It is the times that I’ve ignored my own inklings and inner stirrings that I’ve suffered the most.
But somewhere along the way of discussing depression aloud and within my marriage, I realized that this wasn’t burdensome to my husband, it was just another layer he stood on the altar and said yes to. And that maybe if I extended a little of his grace toward myself, things would ease.
There’s no greater gift than to be fully seen and accepted anyhow. Nine little words—and one man who refuses to give up—reassured me of that.
Yes, today will be a good day.
Not because it comes naturally, but because we have the power to make it one.
To More Love,
Stephanie
