As usual, we did a few fireworks of our own last night. Also as usual, there were a few surprises and it got a little out of hand at times. If you’ve hung around me much, you’ve probably picked up on the fact that I’m a rule-breaker. I don’t like limits (or burn bans, apparently). I love being free. I have secret dreams to have a flower and a peace sign painted on the while cover of the jeep that says, “Not all who wander are lost.”
No really, I do.
There’s so much inside of me that screams for freedom. I want no rules. I want to be free to wander and explore and just “be me”. Rules, processes, planning, especially meetings to make rules, processes or plan- they all really cramp my style and give me the heebie jeebies. I simply must have the freedom to wander.
At the very same time, I’ve learned a lot about the surprising freedom of setting limits.
Especially as a parent. Parenting is a beautiful example of the way setting loving, healthy limits creates surprising freedom. I give the boys boundaries about how far they can go from the house without an adult, and within those boundaries, they are autonomous and free. I limit their screen time and their controls, and within those limits they have plenty of time to play. I maximize their activity and rest time. With enough exercise and rest, they feel better and are able to make better choices throughout the day.
All this because I love them, and I know what’s best for them.
In my adult years, I’m learning to understand that I can set those same boundaries, that provide freedom, for myself as well. What initially feels like a “rule” (that is surely only there to be broken), often turns out to be a healthy boundary that was set in place for safety. Even beyond that, I’ve learned that setting boundaries around my relationships, my time, my commitments, and my work, surprisingly creates exactly the kind of freedom I crave to wander and explore.
There is surprising freedom to be found when you set boundaries for yourself.
What is an area where you’ve learned this well?
What’s an area where you need a little practice?
Wherever you are, know that you’re not alone.
Surprising freedom is a journey for us all.
to more love,
P.S. If you join us tonight, at Freedom Keys GNO, you’re sure to uncover more surprising freedom of your own. We’re saving you a seat!