I posted the “pretty pics” on my social media accounts, but here’s one of the behind the scenes moments of our family photo opp before this handsome young man went out the door to his first Junior Cotillion class. (If you’re like me, and have never heard of Cotillion – it’s a class to teach students social etiquette, respect, and common morals)
I’m not sure if it was the fancy, grown-up clothes he picked out for himself, the pressure of the photos, or the nerves about what was about to happen to him (probably all of the above), but suddenly even a kiss on the cheek became awkward and off limits. While I jokingly wanted to sulk in the sadness of my own “pain and loss”, I knew that moment wasn’t about me.
That moment was about my boy.
We all had a good laugh and quickly moved on to the rest of the photos. On the way, we laughed even more about how awkward this class might feel at first. He couldn’t believe he was going to have to learn to dance with a girl. I snort-laughed while he had ALL the a/c vents pointed on him and said, “Who wears this many layers of clothes?! This is crazy!” I was quite sure it was a combination of all the nerves, pressure AND the layers of clothing he’s not used to, that brought on this sudden heat stroke. Once we arrived, he united with his buddies, his nerves seemed to calm and he was off to the races. This is a big deal for him. It’s a right of passage of sorts.
It’s a big deal for me too.
Not only does it represent the passing of time, and all of us getting older. It was a vivid reminder that the time I have left with him at home is short. . . and getting shorter. When I woke up this morning, I saw this comment from my friend Ann on Facebook:
“Oh Crystal, you are right. It happens soooooo fast! Take lots of pics and videos!! I hung out last weekend with my daughter, her husband and their four kids and I thought “When did all of this happen!! My little girl is still supposed to be in college, isn’t she??”
Time is moving on, whether I like it or not, and it’s changing the way I see the world. I want to Carpe all the Diems but I’m also human and I get busy, tired and frustrated, even while I’m trying to Carpe Diem.
So what’s a mama to do?
The only thing I can. The only thing you can. While we probably can’t seize entire days, we can seize some of the moments. We don’t know what the next moment holds, and that’s okay. We have this one right here in front of us. And if we mess it up, we’ve got the next one.
We can get back up, dust ourselves off as quickly as we can, and try to seize this one.
If you feel like you’re watching time fly by before your eyes, like it’s some sort of out of body experience, welcome to the club. It’s stressful to feel like the clock is ticking and you might not be doing it all right. Believe me, I know! Here’s some good news for you (& me) today, you can seize this moment.
Nunc Occupare
It doesn’t quite have the same ring to it, but it’s more realistic. The next time you’re having one of those good moments you want to remember, just seize that one. Take a mental snapshot of the moment you’re in.
A smile and a sweet wave goodbye? Seize that one.
A nice moment during dinner? Seize that one too.
A good hug before bed? Especially seize that one.
The kids are fine. They will remember your love, even when you don’t feel like you’re taking in the moments the way you wish you could. You’re doing a great job. If you’re taking in a few moments of each day, you’re Carpe’ing enough Diem.
Seize this moment.
Nunc Occupare. (LOL)
to more love,
Crystal
