Secrets lose their power in the light

If you’ve opened your social media in the past two days and you are friends with any other women at all, you’ve seen it.  You’ve seen the courage of women you know personally, with their posts of “me too”.

What you might not have seen is the sweat in her palms, her shaking fingers and the tears relentlessly streaming down her cheek as she typed those words.  It may seem like an easy copy/paste update.  It may feel hollow to those just scrolling past.

But those two words heal, they always have.  

Many of us don’t know how to respond.  We don’t know whether to like her post, put a heart for her courage or sad face for her pain.   They are all valid responses.  Just respond.  Let her know you see her.  Let her know that you believe her.  You stand with her.

You agree with her that this is FOR REAL.  

If your news feed is full of “me toos”, you can be sure that so is your street, your office, your school and your Starbucks.  The old stats of “1 out of 6” are being obliterated as women find safe places to bring the darkness, the misplaced shame, and the horror of their stories to light.  The beauty of the way this is happening inside the Facebook feed is seeing a friend courageously post “Me too” and watching her comment thread fill with “me toos” that can, for now, only be posted in the comments.

There are so many stories that still can’t be shared publicly.  

For every woman who bravely tells her “me too” story, with trembling heart and hands, there is another who can begin to find hope, healing and courage.  She may not be able to share it today, or this week, or even this year.  But because of the courage of the ones who went first, the ones who’ve done the work of healing and the ones who are ready to start, she can see a way forward.  She now knows, without a doubt, that she is not alone.

She can begin to see that it was never her fault.  

If that is your story, I see you.  I know your heart is aching.  Please find someone safe to share your story with, a close friend, a therapist, a mentor or even a private online group.  Secrets lose their power in the light.

Thank you Alyssa Milano.

Thank you to each of you who have braved the words “Me too”.  

You are healing the world.  You are healing your neighbors.  You are healing your closest friends.  You are healing women you’ve never met.

This is love. 

Only light can drive out darkness.  You are bringing the light.

Keep going.  

to more love,

Crystal

P.S.  I’ve seen men, real men, respond with curiosity and care. (Thank you!)  I’ve also seen broken men respond with rebuke, hatred, and even annoyance.  Hurt people hurt people.  That’s how it will continue until they finally heal.  Let them be.  It’s not your job to heal them.  Their pain isn’t yours to carry.

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