Our family legend has it that back in the 1980’s one of my sisters, who will remain nameless, thought it was more important to have friends wearing her friendship pins, than it was to keep mom’s hand-painted ceramic nativity scene intact. She would pluck off the glued adornments, one by one, while no one was looking and sneak off to her room to create the most fabulous friendship pins anyone had ever seen.
It wasn’t until years later, Mom became wise to this scheme.
When we were young, there wasn’t much we wouldn’t do for friendship. It felt like the whole world revolved around being in the “in crowd” and having enough friends to sustain us. And if friendship pins proved we had enough, then by golly, we were going to have loads of them.
Clearly, we’ve outgrown this stage.
Right? Or maybe our social media friend/follower counts have simply taken the place of these handmade pins. Of course, we don’t pay attention to those kinds of things anymore. So it doesn’t really matter . . . except that sometimes we do. And that matters.
It matters because it puts the emphasis on quantity over quality.
Social media so easily (and I believe so often, unintentionally) leaves us feeling left out. Like we’re not cool enough or trendy enough. . . or invited enough. It’s the nature of the beast. It’s just the “friendship pins” of our adulthood.
So what do we do?
We keep our Facebook and Instagram friends. . . as many as we like. But we remember that the real friendship “pins” are created over coffee, across the table, via vox, or voice texting. We show up for them, because friendship pins are built on authenticity, openness, and trust. Each bead represents a drop of love, a struggle shared, a visit to a messy house, a tear shed, and a joy celebrated. Beads are slowly added, over time.
But of course, if you have an unlimited supply of expensive beads from a ceramic set, make all the pins you can!
Give them away like candy!
No bead left behind. (Sorry mom!)
to more love, & friendship,